you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
Randomize
