Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
Randomize
