Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
