Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
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