omg this kid i'm babysitting is making a penis out of playdough ahhhh.
He just rolled me a 'baby penis' as opposed to his 'big boy' penis that he crafted...he just demanded that I roll him a penis.
she was pretty much dry humping my leg when her boyfriend walked in. he says "you should probably leave." all i could come up with was "YEAH, I KNOW!"
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
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