you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
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