And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
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