Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
How did you make it to work sans hangover?
4 words: Clif Bar soaked in tequila. Just like albert pujols
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
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