He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
Having Father’s Day on Pride weekend is always so awkward. “Hey dad just calling to say I love you.” While I’m navigating my way through a pop up pool at a bar riding a penis floatie. Happy Father’s Day.
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
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