See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
We're using joints as your birthday candles
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
Randomize
