I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Randomize
