Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Randomize