There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
Did I ever tell you that the first person i made out with cried?
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
Randomize
