he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
I can get there in 20, one question, Drress Code? Stripper Lite (make up may require an additional 5-10 minutes), Suggestive Professor (professor Kamil's cleavage ain't got nothing on me), Daywear, Dyke (and trust me you ain't seen dyke), or Exactly What I'm Wearing Right Now. (all of the above may arrive under a coat and are subject to my level of sobriety. Which is currently like nonexistent).--xoxo you know you love me, Gossip Girl.
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
