There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
Randomize
