YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
I drunkenly said, "That's my future father-in-law!" And everyone made an uncomfortable / disgusted face... including the aforementioined future father-in-law. Maybe I should start dating other people.
Oh I had the weirdest dream in which I was an archeologist stealing a golden dildo from a snobby British person
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