it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
You took all of my sister's dolls and threw them out the window and then you started talking to her etcha sketch and mr. potato head. I later found you passed out in front of Toy Story and it all made sense.
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
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