Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
I don't know who's more excited for you to come home. Me or my vagina
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
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