Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
Randomize
