At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
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