do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
WHY DID YOU INVITE ALEX?!?
Because she offered to bring a keg.
And also because you fucked her in an alley last week and I'm trying to be a good friend.
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
Randomize
