If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
Acid is not a monday night drug
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
Randomize
