im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
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