can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize
