Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
Whenever you feel bad about your life, just remember the time I tried to swim while high and thought for a minute I was genuinely drowning
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
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