i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
Randomize
