She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
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