omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
Randomize