He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
I'm paying a homeless guy $20 to follow me around bars tonight with a boombox playing the theme to Rocky.
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
Randomize
