Moan for me like Helen Keller
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
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