Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
What's the point of bringing a Jack and Coke to work if my boss is just gonna piss and moan about me day drinking again?
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
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