if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Randomize