Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
Randomize
