We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
I woke up at 2 AM to find them in my living room with a radio flyer wagon full of milk glass plates and a Holstein cow. How am I going to explain this to my landlord!?!
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
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