I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Randomize
