i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
Randomize
