Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
Randomize
