I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
only if we run a train.
done.
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
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