Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Randomize
