Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
You were laying next to me in bed at 4:30 a.m. I asked if you were drunk and you said you weren't drunk you were buzzed like a bumblebee. Then kept rambling on about having to call out of work.
Randomize
