Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
I need to keep a secret stash of instant alcoholic margaritas for when i deal with people. For example, right now, im grading, and I just don't fucking care any more. My students should make a thank you card for Jose Cuervo.
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
Randomize
