I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
Randomize