Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
don't take this the wrong way, but I'm not drunk but I need you to take me to the ER and you're the most likely to not be drunk now.
Randomize
