my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
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