Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
Why do I feel like that's not the first time you've drank champagne with someone dressed as a unicorn?
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
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