Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
I'm trying to think of how to explain to the dentist tomorrow that I think I pulled my jaw muscle eating pizza while drunk.
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
woke up this morning with a big mac and chips on a plate, coke in a glass and a knife and fork AND NAPKIN waiting for me in front of my computer. PORN WAS ALREADY PLAYING. I LOVE DRUNK ME
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
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