Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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