U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
Randomize
