I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
Still dying that you shit outside
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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