I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Randomize
