walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
Randomize