Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
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