i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
home. puking in laundry basket.
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
Flight got cancelled. Stayed in the same hotel as the flight crew so now I can cross Sex with Pilot off the bucket list
He regularly flies into DC, so I’m going to sign him up for my Frequent Flyer program!
Randomize
